THE FIBROMATES JOURNAL

A Journey Towards Emotional Acceptance

by Irene Roth, Blog Editor/Writer

Living with fibromyalgia is often described as navigating a labyrinth of pain, fatigue, and uncertainty. This chronic condition, characterized by widespread musculoskeletal pain and a range of other symptoms, can be incredibly challenging, not just physically but emotionally. Acceptance is a crucial step in managing fibromyalgia effectively and leading a fulfilling life despite the condition.

This journey towards emotional acceptance involves several key steps, including acknowledging the reality of the condition, allowing yourself to grieve, building a support network, focusing on what you can control, and seeking professional help when needed.

The first and perhaps most difficult step in emotional acceptance is coming to terms with the reality of fibromyalgia. It’s essential to understand that fibromyalgia is a legitimate and chronic condition that affects your body and your daily life. This acceptance begins with recognizing that the symptoms you experience are not just temporary inconveniences but a significant part of your reality. By acknowledging the condition, you can start to adjust your expectations and embrace a new approach to life.

Acceptance involves understanding that fibromyalgia may alter your lifestyle and daily routines. You might need to adjust your work habits, social activities, and even your personal goals. Recognizing that this is a normal part of managing a chronic condition can help reduce feelings of frustration or denial.

Secondly, grieving is an important part of the acceptance process. Fibromyalgia often leads to a sense of loss—whether it’s the loss of your previous level of health, the ability to participate in certain activities, or the expectations you once had for your life. It’s crucial to allow yourself to feel and process these emotions. It’s normal to experience a range of feelings, including sadness, anger, or anxiety. Suppressing these emotions can delay acceptance and hinder emotional well-being.

Grieving doesn’t mean giving up; rather, it’s about acknowledging what has changed and finding ways to cope. Allow yourself time and space to grieve, and understand that this is a natural part of adapting to a new reality.

Third, take steps to build a support network.  Connecting with others who have fibromyalgia can be incredibly beneficial. Support groups, whether in person or online, provide a platform for sharing experiences and learning from those who understand the challenges of living with fibromyalgia. These connections can offer validation, reduce feelings of isolation, and provide practical advice for managing symptoms.

Fourth, focus on what you can control. One of the most empowering steps in accepting fibromyalgia is focusing on what you can control. While you may not be able to control the symptoms of fibromyalgia, you can control how you respond to them. Adopting a mindset that emphasizes adaptability and resilience is crucial. This might involve setting realistic goals, adopting a flexible approach to daily activities, and finding new ways to enjoy life despite limitations.

Fifth, engage in self-care practices that promote physical and emotional well-being. Regular exercise, a balanced diet, and relaxation techniques can help manage symptoms and improve overall quality of life. Celebrate small victories and progress, and be kind to yourself when things don’t go as planned.

Embracing fibromyalgia is a journey that involves acknowledging the condition, allowing yourself to grieve, building a support network, and focusing on what you can control can help.

Emotional acceptance is not about resigning yourself to a life of limitation but rather about finding ways to live well despite the challenges. By taking these steps, you can foster resilience, improve your quality of life, and approach each day with a renewed sense of hope and strength.

How to Be Proactive About Your Health

by Irene Roth, Blog Editor/Writer

There are many benefits to living a re-focused kind of life. Take the time to find the positives. This is where developing a positive mindset comes in. Living with a chronic condition, such as fibromyalgia, can have benefits.

When I was first diagnosed with fibromyalgia, I’d go down negative vortexes of thought and emotion that made my life so much harder. It took me a long time to realize that I was hurting myself by allowing my negative thoughts and emotions to overpower the more rational and intuitive part of me. I felt cheated somehow. I wanted to do everything that I used to. But this was the wrong mindset to appropriate for me.

What I needed to do desperately is to listen to my body and slow down. But I fought this with all my might. I felt like a looser when I didn’t get a lot done. Little did I know, I was actually hurting myself physically but also psychologically in the process.

I viewed slowing down as a sign of weakness. I was brought up to keep going even when I wasn’t feeling well. I had to keep pushing through regardless. But this was detrimental of my overall health and well being.

I later learned that not only was slowing down not diminishing to me physically but it was an important part of accepting my fibro. Therefore, it was actually positive and in line with what I was going through at the time.

This was a huge aha moment for me. What I was brought up to believe was actually turned on its head. Slowing down can actually help me live better with my disease!

Here are some benefits to slowing down and changing my mindset that I learned the hard way.

  • We’ll really notice so many things in our environment that we may have never seen, such as the deep purple carnations and petunias, the different shades of sunsets, the dew in the morning, the feeling of peace on rainy days, and so on.
  • We’ll slow down. When we rush, we stress more.
  • We’ll resist monkey mind which is where our thoughts run from one thing to the next unconsciously. Instead, we’ll focus on what we’re doing in each moment.
  • We’ll stop focusing on what we can’t do and only on what we can.
  • We’ll take things as they come and not overthink it.
  • We’ll leave earlier for appointments and reduce our stress levels.
  • We won’t push ourselves past your limits but honor them.
  • We’ll listen and honor our beautiful body.
  • We’ll take the time to take four or five deep breaths throughout the day.

By taking these steps to slow down, you will accept your fibromyalgia and live a good quality life. Further, you will take steps to reduce your pain and frustration levels by being mindful of your thoughts and attitudes towards your illness. Your mindset matters. The more positive you are, the better will your quality of life be.

Fibro Warriors Are Resilient

By Irene Roth, Blog Editor/Writer

I’m in the throes of a fibro flare today. But I decided to write, anyway. There are such moments when my life becomes so difficult and I feel so alone. I have difficulty focusing. My body hurts all over. My neck really aches and my head actually feels heavy. Not sure why. I don’t know enough about anatomy. But I know that fibro flares have widespread pain, and there’s nothing I can do about that.

So how can I ensure that I can accept my predicament? Probably by not fighting it and accepting this as my new reality from time to time. What we fight tends to grow. What’s more, we stress ourselves out by fighting what is. The more stress we feel, the more pain we feel. And we may even be bringing on a fibro flare, possibly by fighting it.

Also, by not fighting our pain and fatigue, we can become more resilient. People who live with fibro struggle with debilitating pain and various comorbidities, which can snap the joy right out of life. It’s very hard to live with fibro and still enjoy life unless we change our mindset.

Here are a few positive resiliency traits of individuals living with fibro.

*1. We are resilient. Fibro is challenging and complex to live with. We have to learn how to bounce back quickly, dogging triggers and attacks, or recover from them. This is a fundamental part of coping with the pain and fatigue of fibro, as well as all its comorbidities.

*2. We experience a lot of strength. We are able to tough out the debilitating symptoms and get our lives back on track quickly. Fibro flares are like battles. We must fight through them to get to the other wide as best as we can so that we can get back to living our lives.

*3. We are empathic. Because we struggle with so much pain, we are able to empathize when others are struggling as well. Seeing and understanding another’s pain, struggles, and difficulties are innate abilities we pick up along the way.

*4. We appreciate others with sincerity and without the expectation of anything in return. We accept help and know that without our tribe, we couldn’t survive on those hard days.

*5. We develop courage. Fibro knocks us down more often than we’d like to admit. Yet, we continue to have the courage to get backup and keep trying. This is because we face adversity often. This makes us stronger and more able to keep on living our best life.

By recognizing the amazing resiliency traits that we can develop over time because of living with fibro, we can be proud of ourselves. And when we have hard days, and yes, there will be quite a few, we can rejoice that we’re able to cope and find some modicum of peace in a day that’s riddled with pain and fatigue.