by Guest Blogger Dale Rockell, Fibro and Photos
My Oxford Dictionary describes courage as the “ability to control fear when facing danger or pain”.
Living with Fibro is not a choice so are we courageous for coping and keeping going? Unfortunately, we have a nervous system that is stuck in ‘fight or flight’ so it’s not so easy convincing our bodies there is no danger, if this applies, but we carry on the best we can and learn techniques to acknowledge and cope. We may be very good at masking our fears of our situation including financial considerations, societal understanding, expectations and stigma, and the impact on relationships, but it takes more courage to open up and share our stories, concerns and challenges.
Fibro creates a ‘new normal’. We have to be courageous in setting new boundaries with ourselves and others, accepting limitations and building new routines, feel able to share our story and challenges with others for understanding of how we need to live and any support needed, and adapt our activities so that we still feel we have a life, albeit maybe not the one we, or others had hoped. It also takes courage to let things and people go that no longer serve us or we are no longer able to do, to hang on may only cause more pain. Courage comes initially from appreciating the little things that you do to make your Fibro life easier to cope with.
I have been fascinated by spiritual philosophy for many years, and practised yoga and meditation for over 20 years. When Fibro hit very hard in 2019, I found myself strangely at peace with it, I was in too much pain, fatigued and lacking cognitive function to do anything else, something told me to just go with it, despite having to leave a good management job. Courage was needed more in dealing with others’ fears, expectations and lack of understanding, but ultimately in my understanding that there was no danger, just a lot of pain.
As much as managing personal boundaries and understanding our needs is important, I believe we should also have the courage to keep testing our limitations, research how our symptoms respond to know if we’re improving our function, and to not apologise for trying to have some life despite Fibro.
In October 2024 I was asked by the Photographic Club I joined in April if I would do a short presentation about how photography helps me cope with Fibro. I shared my story, including my logistics management background and professional qualifications as I felt I should pre-qualify that I’m not lazy and proactively address potential stigma, with images from the past five years; blending the photographic aims with the positive and negative impact by, and on my Fibro. I finished my talk in a lot of pain and significant cognitive decline, but the overwhelming response from members was positive and of genuine interest in both Fibro and my photography. I hardly slept that night because of the pain, but felt a sense of achievement.
Having the courage to share my story for the first time with people who knew very little, if anything, of Fibro or me as a person opened up many more conversations, new friendships, and an invitation to speak to another local group in February 2025, plus a comment from a member who knew someone with Fibro, had been sceptical of how much they said it impacted them but were now challenging how they view that situation.
I have now been sharing my Fibro and photography journey for two years. I doubted myself at first, but the Fibro community encouraged and supported me, particularly as a man with Fibro. I found courage by finding my ‘tribes’ with common interests and passions in the online worldwide Fibro community, and the local photographic community, albeit with very careful pacing, and finding your ‘tribe’, a community that resonates with you, is my biggest recommendation to others with Fibro.
Dale Rockell is a photographer based in the historic UK market town of Leighton Buzzard, and is very lucky to be within a short walk of some great countryside including woodlands and the Grand Union Canal. The photographs displayed in this post have been provided, with permision, by Dale, for your enjoyment.
While his main focus is landscapes – including what has become known as ‘portal’ images, he enjoys the opportunity of capturing and creating nature, cityscapes, portraits, models, travel, and abstract smoke art images, when the opportunities arise. A selection of his images can be viewed on the main menu of his website https://fibroandphotos.wordpress.com/.
He lives with Fibromyalgia, a chronic health condition. When he had to leave his management career in 2019 after Fibromyalgia brought him mentally and physically to a standstill, photography become one of his creative therapies, (along with music), to distract him from the 24/7 discomfort and challenges of living with fibro.
